Okay so I admit I’m guilty. I’ve often called golf the six-letter b word…………………….BORING! I love to play, but watching on television? Um, no. Sometimes it leaves a little to be desired and I’d rather watch just about anything from gastro bypass surgery to deer hunting (SNORE). I mean how often can I watch a perfect 700 yard drive, a deft 40 yard putt over the sand trap-shy of the water and perfectly on the green, or least I continue; an impossible putt that winds around the perfectly read green and sinks into the hole. Stroke after stroke I end up getting jealous, indignant, or just plain pissed off. Other sports don’t bother me so much because I hold no disillusions. I don’t kid myself and throw on a pair of basketball shorts and whiz around the court with 6-foot tall men, nor do I strap on my spandex and throw around some pigskin with 250lb linebackers. I do however play golf. For I, like many have fallen trap to the age-old adage that golf is the layman’s sport. A sport where young and old, men and women, frail and strong are all meeting together amongst the grass and sand on an equal playing field. Not true. 

 

Sundays I pride myself on my color coordinated golf attire making me look like the pro I should be. My matching golf bag (pink), golf gloves (pink), shoes (pink), shirt (pink) and balls (of course, also pink) all pervade an air competence, until I drive off my first tee. Dignity gone but still clad in pink I aspire greatly on each hole only to get irritated and disappointed about remembering the golf pros on television the day before. Tiger Woods and the like on television help only to immaculate the confidence I do have. To me not slicing is hard, pitching is a *$&^@* and putting, well putting I truly just don’t believe I physically, mentally or emotionally possess the patience for. SO when my fair remote finds golfers on television I fly by without a moments pause or reflection. Rather than the awe and wonder I should feel I merely acquiesce myself to imagine golf is boring, tedious, dreary and dull. In effect I want the equality the sport of golf claims. Admit it, football is for the physically agile, muscular, and strong but even the most adroit, competent and cocky quarterbacks get surprised, blitzed and knocked flat in the dirt every now and again (come on you know you love it too!). So my plight is merely that golf is held accountable to the same standards. We need some action, some excitement or at least some flair. Have the pros play with the rules we play upon our fairways and greens. Imagine Tiger Woods having to contend with the pitfalls we endure—the dogleg left on the 5^th green after 2 pitchers of long island ice teas, or the “pants down rule” if you don’t pass the women’s tee on your drive. 

Just a thought.

 

SO since the consensus among many is that golf is to boring I encourage you to suggest what would make it enjoyable for you? What would make you rush home with a bucket of wings to turn on the big tournament on the 50 inch plasma? A few ideas from this site:

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Also, there ought to be some wild animals on the course, like alligators, cows, meerkats, sheep, deer, turtles, etc.

What do you think?

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